16 December 2014

One thing I forgot to mention

I am no longer a birthworker.  I am not taking doula clients.  I am not teaching childbirth classes.

I stopped taking births a while ago when the kids started going to French school.  I had thought that with the kids in the school across the street, it would free up my schedule because they could just walk home and a big kid would be home already so I would be free to take clients who could go into labor at any time.  But when we decided to put the kids in French school, they had to be driven every morning and afternoon.  Which requires an adult.  And that meant that I wasn't free to be at a birth 24/7.  I needed to worry about transportation.  So I stopped taking doula clients.

I was still teaching childbirth classes, though.  A lot of them.  Eventually, a new hospital opened up and I took the opportunity to teach there where I would be the only natural childbirth instructor and get to be a part of the program there from the ground up.  It was awesome.  I loved this smaller hospital and the intimate atmosphere.  I loved the relationship I was developing with the nurses and careproviders in L&D that hadn't happened in the big hospital I was at before.

And of course I loved teaching.  And birth.  Especially teaching about birth.  But it was becoming increasingly harder to leave my family one night a week.  In fact, for a while, it was the only night everyone else was home and unscheduled!

There were a few other things going on at work, too.  Just some hoops I had to jump through.  But jumping through those hoops when I was already feeling the way I was feeling was just too much.  One time no one signed up for my class and so I spent the next 8 weeks just enjoying not having to go anywhere at night.  Not having to stress.  I stress pretty easily now that I spent chunks of my day at the office.  Speaking of which, I was working days at the office.  Which made it that much harder to leave at night.  Even if it was only one evening a week.

So I resigned.

I felt bad for leaving them in the lurch and knowing they'd have to hire someone and for all the hassle that would be.  But I have not looked back.  I enjoy my evenings at home and not having to worry about anything but my family.  I haven't even missed teaching yet.  In fact, I mostly find myself not thinking about birth stuff at all.  Staying out of the fray, so to speak.  There is still lots of birth activism going on and I'm content to let it all pass by me.  I hope my daughters will find my professional and personal experience helpful and not annoying.  And I hope to be able to talk to and support anyone who;s interested.  I still love it!  But I'm ok just letting those opportunities come when they do, rather then scheduling them weekly, I guess.

My husband is a rockstar

This morning the alarm went off and I lay there in bed trying to not want to go back to sleep.  I know that if I can just have a few minutes of transition, things go better.  So I thought of what a great and busy day yesterday was and as I looked forward to today, I started thinking of all the things I had to do and I started to pray.  I'm not sure how effective those prayers are while I'm still lying down in my bed.  But I can't seem to drag myself out of the bed to kneel and I know how important it is to pray first thing.  I think my life is filled with half-said morning prayers.  But at least I'm still trying.

This particular morning the thought that drove me out from under my warm blankets and away from me toasty 6 year old was FOOD.  I have desperately needed to grocery shopping for at least a week.  And every morning when I have to come up with breakfast and take-away lunches for the crew it has been getting more and more difficult.  And the lunches have been getting smaller and smaller.  I've been managing on breakfasts for everyone except Wiyah because she has a serious aversion to oatmeal and because her TMJ prevents her from eating many of our go-to breakfast foods.

So there I was, half-prayed and stressing about what on earth I was going to feed people.  I got up and looked around hoping that somehow, miraculously, I would be able to come up with SOMETHING the way I had for the past week.  But it didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that was a losing battle.  So I quickly shod my feet and walked out into the cold, black morning.

I hurried through the grocery store and made it back just a few minutes late to wake people up.  Which would have been just fine except I hadn't factored in that I needed to get the groceries out of the car.  I was running super behind.

And that was when my husband swooped in and brought the rest of the groceries in.  Then I went around waking children and helping them get dressed while he put the food away.  Hurrying the children along, it was almost as if I wasn't 25 minutes late!  We had family prayer and JJ hasn't been feeling well so he decided to stay home from school today.  About five minutes later I realized that that posed a transportation problem.  How was X going to get to school??  I was trying to think about whether or not the little kids could finish getting ready by themselves so I could take X but the Hubba jumped in and took him himself.  He got back just in time to turn around and take the elementary school kids right back to where he had just been dropping off X.

Which gave me a minute in this crazy morning to actually blog about it.

15 December 2014

Overheard

Reading on facebook...

Baboo:  I made someone cry with my post?  I made you cry with my post?
Me:  Yep.
JJ:  What post?
Me:  Read him what you wrote.
Baboo:  Today my mom said, "I'm so behind on everything! I've been getting nothing done recently. I haven't even finished Christmas shopping yet."
I remembered that a few days ago, when she texted me late one night while I was out to sign some Christmas cards when I got in. I got home to find stuffed stockings laid out for my mission companions who are still in Canada who will be away from home this Christmas.And then today I watched her run extra errands to serve my dad, and make me lunch even though I can do it on my own, and treat a sibling who had a rough start to their day, and respond to the sister missionaries' requests to drive them ALL OVER TOWN and wait for them while they ate lunch and went grocery shopping.
I'm grateful for a mom who doesn't believe in taking days off, who doesn't ever think "I just need some ME time," who is a mom 100% of the time and a Christlike servant to everyone else. And even if she may not be accomplishing everything she wants to this season, she certainly understands that "giving" around Christmastime means more than buying gifts. She gives her heart, and she wears herself out doing it. I love my mom.

JJ:  Awww!  Sweet.
Me:  I know.
Baboo (stage whisper to JJ):  Mom's going to get me whatever I want this week.  You can try next week.  But don't overlap or she'll catch on.


Baboo:  I could have just told you that in person, but--
Me:  But you know your mother.

Little Things

*  Last night, Baboo climbed into our bed, under the covers, between the Hubba and I and had her head on the Hubba's shoulder listening while he read letters from his mission.  She got very sleepy and was starting to fall asleep.  X carried her down two flights of stairs to her bedroom.

*  Wiyah's laugh.  And the funny situation where we were in a drive through in a car with a broken window that wouldn't roll down (I had to shout our order) and a locking mechanism that was frozen so I couldn't open the door.

*  Driving our wonderful sister missionaries around all day.  I loved the feeling of the pull of all the things I had to accomplish that day and just setting them all aside to spend some time helping out these lovely women.  It wasn't all self-less giving.  I was actually feeling pretty selfish because I enjoy them so much.

*  There is a family about a mile away who put up a lighted nativity display every year.  This is our ninth Christmas in this house and every year I look forward to their simple, beautiful decoration.  Every time I come into or go out of my neighborhood, I see it and remember the Savior.  I love that their house has become a Christmas tradition that I look forward to every year.  This year I gave them a Christmas card introducing myself and telling them how much I appreciated their efforts.  And my husband thought good things about me for doing it.

*  X really wanted to participate in an activity that was happening on Monday nights.  We told him that we were keeping Monday nights open for a family night and that he could not participate.  And then I apologized.  He said, "That's ok, Mom" and gave me his smile.

*  Writing missionaries.

*  Today I got kissed on both cheeks at the same time by X and Kelvinator.

*  Baboo's facebook post:

Today my mom said, "I'm so behind on everything! I've been getting nothing done recently. I haven't even finished Christmas shopping yet."

I remembered that a few days ago, when she texted me late one night while I was out to sign some Christmas cards when I got in. I got home to find stuffed stockings laid out for my mission companions who are still in Canada who will be away from home this Christmas.
And then today I watched her run extra errands to serve my dad, and make me lunch even though I can do it on my own, and treat a sibling who had a rough start to their day, and respond to the sister missionaries' requests to drive them ALL OVER TOWN and wait for them while they ate lunch and went grocery shopping.

I'm grateful for a mom who doesn't believe in taking days off, who doesn't ever think "I just need some ME time," who is a mom 100% of the time and a Christlike servant to everyone else. And even if she may not be accomplishing everything she wants to this season, she certainly understands that "giving" around Christmastime means more than buying gifts. She gives her heart, and she wears herself out doing it. I love my mom.

*  And my good friend's comment to that post:

Your mom is one of the awesomest people I know. I love her!




Overheard

While cleaning the kitchen...
Kelvinator:  we are learning about cells in school.
Me:  yeah?  You like that?
Kelvinator:  Yeah!  My favorite organelle in the cell is probably the mitochondria or the endoplasmic reticulum.
-------
While eating  Wiyah's birthday cake...
X:  that's basically a sugar cube shaped like a snowflake.
Mack:  I don't know what a sugar cube is but I'm guessing I like it.

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